Monday, October 3, 2011

FULL TIME

It's official!

As of last Wednesday, I am teaching FULL TIME. This means when the students come in at the beginning of the day until students leave at the end of the day, I will be the lead teacher. One Literature class. Two mathematics classes. Two science classes. Wow!

I am starting to find my pace for everything. It is the preparation that is the most tedious part of it all. I know when I have been teaching for a couple of years, I will be spending less time on this. I want to make it as fun as possible for the students. One of my students always asks me, "Ms. Griffin, are we going to do something fun today in science?" My response to him: "We always do something fun in science!"

I can't decide what subject area I like more: Math or science. My cooperating teacher says I am stronger in math, but I am really enjoying science, because there is more to do with it. There are more ways to make it engaging. I am glad I was blessed with the opportunity to teach both subject areas to get a taste of both.

The students have been great for the most part. The typical chattiness happens here and there, but overall, I love my students. I wish I was able to spend more one on one time with each of them to get to know them more.  I think once I get the hang of everything and become more comfortable, I will be able to do that.

Now for the real, deep honesty: I am constantly feeling tired and worn down.  I don't feel like I ever get caught up to where I need to be. If I do get caught up then I end up not getting enough sleep or something else ends up getting cut out of my life. "Me" time is pretty much NONEXISTENT.  I feel like I am constantly on the verge of having a melt down. I feel like alot of the times what I do is sub-par and not good enough. I have never felt this drained: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

In the midst of all this. I am learning so much and being challenged so much. I am learning so much about my own teaching styles. Who I am as a person, a friend, a teacher, and more.  This is a very tough experience for me, but I would never give it back. I am thankful for every second of it. For every tear of frustration. For every excited face of a student. For every late night staying up to plan for a 50 minute lesson. For every conversation with a student. For every feeling of accomplishment. I wouldn't give it back for a second.

Praise God for how He is challenging me and making me ever so more dependable on Him. Are you allowing Him to lead your life right now? Are you allow the challenges you are being faced with to be an opportunity to lean more on Him? Think about it.

Until next time,
K

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