A Special Kind of Love

There is a special kind of love when you teach. At least for me there is.

I love my students so much when:

1. The lightbulb goes off when they understand a topic
2. They give you hugs in the hallway
3. They want to tell you about what is going on in their life
4. They write you sweet cards
5. They participate in class
6. They try to act so tough and mature, but underneath that image is a sweet and innocent child still.
7. I don't want to get up in the mornings, but I picture their faces and immediately get up
8. I get to hang out and talk with them at lunch.
9. They say they have missed me
10. They genuinely try at their assignments and end up being so successful
11. They still respect me at the end of the day because they know I respect them
12. I can get so frustrated, but yet still love each and every one of them at the end of the day
13. They do kind things for others and don't realize that I noticed it
14. They aren't afraid to be vulnerable and open up to me
15. They come into school with a positive and optimistic attitude

I have grown to love my students so much! They have a special place in my heart. They always will be the students that I taught first. This group of students will have that title.

Yes, there are days where I get so frustrated and easily worn down. There are moments when I need to walk away for a moment because I am annoyed. It happens. It is not the end of the world. I realized that it is okay to step away for a few moments to gather yourself back together and continue guiding and leading the students. I try to make sure to constantly show love to my students. They might not always see it, but it's there. It's tough love. If they don't see it, I make sure to tell them I love them on a regularly basis. Some of them may have not ever heard those words being directed towards them. They all need to hear it.

This has always been my mission statement: To love others unconditionally.  I want to continue this mission into my classroom and into the future. It is this kind of passion and care that keeps the fire burning for teaching.

Until next time,
K

Going with the flow.

One of my life mottos: Go with the flow.

In student teaching, I have to just go with the flow. I have to be flexible. One thing at a time. I am human. I am not superwoman.

Most days I am wishing there were an extra two hours so I was able to get more accomplished. I finally don't feel completely far behind from what I need to do during student teaching. Things are slowly fitting into place. Mind you, I still have plenty of things I need to do on a regularly basis like grade papers, formulate tests/quizzes/rubrics/powerpoints and other odds and ends, I am at least trying to stay on top of planning for the coming weeks. I am doing this for my kids. Yes, they are MY kids. I have grown to become soo protective of them. Like a mother hen and her chicks. Sure, during the day, some of them drive me a little crazy with their random outbursts and side-conversations, but at the end of the day, I would still keep all of them.

Last Thursday, I participated in the Running Club with my students. Had such a fabulous time. I ended up walking with six of my students for about thirty minutes. I really enjoyed seeing them outside the classroom. On Friday, one of the students that participated in the Running Club with me raised her hand and said, "Ms. Griffin, I had fun yesterday with you in Running Club." That made me feel good :)

Life outside of student teaching is going well. Three weeks ago, my mother came to visit and we had a WONDERFUL time together relaxing and shopping. Last weekend, I went to visit Benjamin and we had a great time going to a football game and spending time together. This weekend, I worked the desk a bunch, worked on halloween decorations, worked on lesson plans, and slept. It has been very low key weekends, which is exactly what my body needs after long weeks at school.

Looking forward to another four-day week! I hope you have a great week as well.

Much love,
K

FULL TIME

It's official!

As of last Wednesday, I am teaching FULL TIME. This means when the students come in at the beginning of the day until students leave at the end of the day, I will be the lead teacher. One Literature class. Two mathematics classes. Two science classes. Wow!

I am starting to find my pace for everything. It is the preparation that is the most tedious part of it all. I know when I have been teaching for a couple of years, I will be spending less time on this. I want to make it as fun as possible for the students. One of my students always asks me, "Ms. Griffin, are we going to do something fun today in science?" My response to him: "We always do something fun in science!"

I can't decide what subject area I like more: Math or science. My cooperating teacher says I am stronger in math, but I am really enjoying science, because there is more to do with it. There are more ways to make it engaging. I am glad I was blessed with the opportunity to teach both subject areas to get a taste of both.

The students have been great for the most part. The typical chattiness happens here and there, but overall, I love my students. I wish I was able to spend more one on one time with each of them to get to know them more.  I think once I get the hang of everything and become more comfortable, I will be able to do that.

Now for the real, deep honesty: I am constantly feeling tired and worn down.  I don't feel like I ever get caught up to where I need to be. If I do get caught up then I end up not getting enough sleep or something else ends up getting cut out of my life. "Me" time is pretty much NONEXISTENT.  I feel like I am constantly on the verge of having a melt down. I feel like alot of the times what I do is sub-par and not good enough. I have never felt this drained: physically, emotionally, mentally, and spiritually.

In the midst of all this. I am learning so much and being challenged so much. I am learning so much about my own teaching styles. Who I am as a person, a friend, a teacher, and more.  This is a very tough experience for me, but I would never give it back. I am thankful for every second of it. For every tear of frustration. For every excited face of a student. For every late night staying up to plan for a 50 minute lesson. For every conversation with a student. For every feeling of accomplishment. I wouldn't give it back for a second.

Praise God for how He is challenging me and making me ever so more dependable on Him. Are you allowing Him to lead your life right now? Are you allow the challenges you are being faced with to be an opportunity to lean more on Him? Think about it.

Until next time,
K